Naked Ladies


Winter 2006


Naked Ladies

COPIOUS NAKED LADIES FOUND (AP) -- It has been three weeks since this hidden enclave at Madrone Springs shook the world for its copious number of naked ladies cavorting in what now appears to be an annual winter ritual. Nearby communities were shocked at the use of these once historic baths for such a purpose.

"We've known of this activity for years, it's sick, it's unnatural," said Park Ranger Archie Bunker. "We've tried to keep it under wraps, but now it's out of the closet. We're going to take a lot of heat for not stopping it while we had the chance."

Across the nation both the righteous and progressive have turned this teapot into a tempest, putting perverse slant on the discovery. "It's just like the cold war, a hideous orgy of Reds," said Karl Rove as he was leaving a strategy meeting at the White House, "but frankly I can't squeeze any useful spin from it to further subjugate my base."

Taking a more pragmatic view, psychologist Dr. Ruth said "Mazeltov, nakedness is beautiful, it's natural. We make so much from nothing. Naked ladies bug us -- that's absurd. Get a life, experience nature in the raw."